Looking back, I have to place the blame not at the feet of the juvenile siblings but rather the solemnity of the service. Years later, while working on a service project in the Bahamas, I had the chance to attend mass at a Baptist church. I was shocked when I witnessed singing, dancing, and clapping. The energy and enthusiasm were palpable. I was captivated. The atmosphere was electric.

Fast-forward to 2008 and the Theater of Dreams, Old Trafford, home of Manchester United. My first experience with live English football just so happened to be the Northwest derby and one of the most heated rivalries in world football, Manchester United  versus Liverpool. I was blown away: by the size of the stadium, the green of the grass, the massive dimensions of the pitch, and just how frigging cold it is in England in March.

But most of all, I was blown away by the atmosphere. I sat in the “Clock End,” opposite the famed Stretford End (and preferred second half target of the Red Devils). It would have been an unremarkable area if not for it being adjacent to the traveling Liverpool supporters. For no less than two hours, the away fans sang their hearts out, from the iconic “You’ll Never Walk Alone” to the simplistic “Ja-vi-er Ma-sche-ra-no! Ja-vi-er Ma-sche-ra-no!”

Despite being trounced 3-nil—and the aforementioned Señor Mascherano getting an early shower—the Scousers never stopped singing. As a result, several MUFC fans in my section never stopped hurling abuse. Either way, it was an incredible atmosphere, the greatest source of live entertainment to which I’d ever been exposed.

The next year, as a birthday present, my mother purchased me a ticket to a European Champions League game: Bayern Munich versus Barcelona. I didn’t realize just how amazing this gift was until I stepped off the train and saw the glowing orb that is the Allianz. From the outside, the arena in Munich is an architectural marvel. On the inside it is a boiling cauldron of chanting, singing, and flag waving.

From high atop the second tier, I was ensconced in a sea of colored flags and banners. The synchronicity of the booming chants proved a cacophonous weapon for the home fans against mighty Barca, already with a three goal-aggregate lead. It may have also been the impetus for the game’s opener, a stunning strike from Franck Ribery. What you can’t hear on television is that every time Ribery finds the net, the stadium finds the song, “Le Champs Elysees” by Joe Dassin, a homage to the winger’s French heritage. Despite Seydou Keita equalizing and putting the tie out of reach, you get the sense that, if nothing else, everyone left the stadium thoroughly entertained.

After all, football is about entertainment. Isn’t it?

Why then do I feel like I’m back kneeling at the pew, scolded for my sacrilege? So-called purists of the game will complain about modern footballers: the neon-colored shoes, the tribal tattoos, the look-at-me haircuts, and the ultimate desecration of their holy ground: goal celebrations. The ranting and raving of the purists would have you believe they want to return to the days when footballers wore button-down shirts, black work boots and feebly tried to move 20-lb. sewn balls. And sometimes it feels like FIFA, and several football associations around the world, feel the same.

Last week, Neymar, the impossibly gifted Brazilian international and (for the time being) Santos forward, was sent off after being booked for wearing a mask emblazoned with his own likeness. Neymar, after carving up the Colo Colo defense on his way to the third goal in the Copa Libertadores contest, took the mask from a fan and duly obliged him by sticking it on, albeit upside-down. The referee, none too pleased, brandished a yellow card to young Neymar, his second of the evening, sealing his exit.

The previous weekend, AC Milan forward Antonio Cassano, far and away the most skilled Italian playing the game today, was booked for removing his shirt after scoring an incredibly important penalty against city rival, Internazionale. A benign gesture at the time, it later proved fatal when he inexplicably pulled down a rushing Inter player to receive his second yellow and marching orders.

Who me? What about the guy with no pants?

Which brings us to our beloved domestic competition, Major League Soccer. Eric Hassli, French forward for expansion franchise Vancouver Whitecaps, was sent off last week for celebrating a goal against New England for removing his shirt. The referee was unimpressed and, even though Hassli was wearing another Whitecaps top underneath, presented him with his second yellow card of the match.

Now, while I can’t condone Roma’s Mirko Vucinic’s de-pantsing trick from last year’s Euro qualifiers, I can empathize with the above predicaments. Why do we demonize celebration? Why do we adopt a puritanical approach to the most hedonistic of sports? Scoring a goal is one of life’s greatest pleasures. Some have gone so far as to rank its resulting euphoria above the pleasure of sex (I might need to quote Lori Petty in Pointbreak here though and say maybe you’re not doing it right, then).

Nevertheless, scoring a goal is an amazing feeling. Whether it’s in a five-a-side pickup game, a high school championship or in front of 80,000 at the San Siro, it is a wonderful thing. Goals, like those who score them, come in all different forms—delicate chips, blasted volleys, nutmegs, backheels, and headers. Goals are great to watch. But every so often, the goal is surpassed by the goal celebration.

I’ve been watching televised soccer for almost 20 years and in that time I’ve seen choreographed dance routines, corner flag boxing bouts, backflips, and fake boat rides. I’ve watched Romario rock his air baby, Cantona look disgusted with the mortals around him and Fabio Grosso look to be on the verge of tears. I’ve seen Totti suck his thumb and Tevez suck his binky. I’ve seen undershirts with messages written on them, from “Free Palestine” to “Feliz Cumpleanos.” Just this past weekend, Argentinian side Velez Sarsfield celebrated a goal and a “cumpleanos” simultaneously when Santiago Silva ran to the touchline to retrieve a lit candle in honor of a teammate’s birthday.

Sure, sometimes these elaborate gestures don’t go off quite as planned. Two weeks ago we all saw Jermain Defoe’s “100” message written on a shirt underneath his jersey, despite the fact that he failed to score his century goal. Then there are the neo-Nazi salutes, the throat slashes, and a whole host of abusive gestures such as the middle finger and the Barry Ferguson “V”.

But, even the most misguided celebrations are often entertaining. And isn’t that what football is all about? It’s the reason we pay way too much for “authentic” replica kits, the reason we save for travel and ticket costs, the reason we plunk down hard-earned dough week in and week out—so we can share in the pleasure, share in the spectacle, be a part of the drama.

I know, I know—a match-winner removing his top can incite fan violence. Has that ever really happened though?  And if so, doesn’t it say more about the person reacting violently to someone removing his shirt than the bare-chested player himself?

Maybe it’s our puritanical roots. Maybe it’s our jealousy. Whatever the reason, it’s ridiculous to think we should expect our heroes to shuffle back to the midway line silently, like nuns in the cloister, heads bowed in reverence for their savior, Sepp Blatter. And maybe that’s exactly what the so-called “purists” want too.

But not me. I’ll be standing, I’ll be cheering, I’ll be chanting. And when Nani follows up a left-footed strike with a perfect 10 backflip, I’ll be applauding both. Because it’s fun. Because it’s entertainment. Because it’s football, bloody hell.

It ain’t church.

Soccer can be the spark that ignites the flames of war

"War Christmas, 1914"

In an already existing atmosphere of heightened political tensions over the borders between El Salvador and Honduras, the qualifying matches for the 1970 World Cup between those two countries led to La guerra del fútbol or “The Football War.” After 100 hours of combat some 3,000 soldiers and civilians were dead and hundreds of thousands of civilians had been displaced. After the war, because each country had won the home leg of their qualifiers, a play-off had to be played, which El Salvador won. They didn’t make it out of the group stages of the World Cup in Mexico and some four decades later the demarcation of the new borders between the two countries has yet to be formalized.

Soccer can be the symbol that finally turns the page on a long ended war

After Holland beat Germany in the semi finals of Euro 1988, an estimated 70% of the population poured into the streets for the largest spontaneous celebration in Holland since its liberation by the Allies in World War Two. Sure, it was revenge for the defeats suffered by Holland against West Germany in the 1974 World Cup Final and in the first round of the 1980 European Championship. But the bitter rivalry between “the Cheeseheads” and “the Krauts” has it’s foundation in World War Two. In 1988, for one night, Holland settled the score.

Soccer can also stop a war, if only for a day

The First World War began in August, 1914. Troops on both sides went to war believing that it would all be over by Christmas. By December, tens of thousand were killed and wounded, trenches had been dug across the length of the Western Front, and peace was four long years away.

Some of the trenches were close enough to one another that voices could be heard from those opposite. On Christmas Eve, 1914, German troops began to decorate their trenches with candles and to sing Christmas songs. British troops answered with Christmas songs of their own. Soon, small parties of troops began to enter No Man’s Land to exchange Christmas greetings and presents with those who, only hours before, they had been expected to kill on sight.

British and German Troops, Christmas Truce, 1914

Many British soldiers had enlisted in the army with groups of friends to form units that were consciously identified with soccer such as the Chelsea “Die Hards” of the 17th Middlesex Regiment and the “2nd Footballers” of the 21st Middlesex Regiment. On the German side, the 133rd Saxon Regiment had a proud pre-war football record.

Officers and soldiers found themselves talking soccer with their enemies. Soon impromptu games were being played with “goals made from caps and frozen sentries, balls from jam-tin bombs and ‘Ole Bill’ woolly mufflers.” In one sector, a British colonel reported that, though the Germans wanted to play a match, the Scots Guards facing them across No Man’s Land were unable to supply a ball.

In Frélinghien, France, British soldiers from Royal Welch Fusiliers faced German soldiers of the Saxon Infantry and the Prussian Jäger. After exchanging two barrels of beer and a Christmas pudding, a match was played. Some 94 years later, soldiers from the descendant units of those which had met during the Christmas Truce played another soccer match where the first had been played before the unveiling of a memorial to commemorate the event.

Such impromptu cease fires were viewed as anathema to military discipline and commanders on both sides were quick to forbid their re-occurrence under threat of swift punishment. Even still, French and German troops managed a Christmas truce in 1915.

While some revisionist historians have questioned whether soccer matches took place during the Christmas Truce, the evidence that they did can be found in the scores of letters, notes, diaries and oral histories of soldiers from both sides. One soldier, Alfred Anderson, described the “eerie sound of silence” as the fighting stopped and soldiers emerged from their trenches to exchange Christmas greetings. Anderson was the sole surviving soldier to have experienced the Christmas Truce when he died at the age of 109 in 2005.

So, in this holiday season, should you have a conversation with some friends or family who “just don’t get this soccer thing,” you can tell them about the games in No Man’s Land, about how soccer stopped a war, if only for a few hours, on the cold, muddy, shell-marked fields of the Western Front.

Click here to view the embedded video.

A version of this article originally appeared on December 25, 2009.

The Magpies even threatened to open the scoring themselves; Wayne Routledge took advantage of an exposed left flank following a rush by defender John O’Shea in the 8^th minute, but Manchester’s central defense held firm against the ensuing cross; Andrew Carroll, active throughout and unmarked on a corner kick in the 11^th minute, headed just wide a ball he should have put away.

While each side experienced their mutual frustrations, the tribulations of Wayne Rooney seemed entirely singular, as the formerly lauded wunderkind of English football tries to emerge from the hadal depths…

As the pressure built, however, Newcastle showed shades of a Championship side, with Nani continuously being the source of their troubles. In a span of four minutes (18^th; 22^nd) he was blatantly fouled twice, each infraction drawing a well deserved yellow; Joey Barton was booked a for a poor attempt at a tackle as Nani surged ahead with menace; James Perch brought him down from behind after Nani got around him while tracking down a bouncing goal kick close to the area.

Their composure seemingly set to completely unravel, Newcastle nearly gifted Dimitar Berbatov a ball in the box in the 27^th minute. The ensuing blind outlet went straight to a pouncing Paul Scholes who somehow managed not to blast it into the back of the net. Three minutes later, only the keeper’s outstretched hand kept Nani from connecting with Berbatov on the far post.

While each side experienced their mutual frustrations, the tribulations of Wayne Rooney seemed entirely singular, as the formerly lauded wunderkind of English football tries to emerge from the hadal depths to which he has descended. Only in maneuvering around defenders could he display a deftness of form, for his finishing was entirely lacking.

So it was with a bit of irony that Berbatov, usually of the masterful near miss, opened the scoring in the 33^rd.

He fired harmlessly wide twice in the opening 15 minutes, his ire compounded by back to back last gasp defending by Newcastle; Fabricio Coloccini denied a goal mouth shot following a feed from the right by Valencia; a sure breakaway was subsequently prevented just as he looked ready to rush forward. A misfire at the top of the box followed in the 20^th; in the 31^st Berbatov headed down a Valencia cross only for Rooney to fire wide into the seats. Again, he followed with a hard charging run that was killed off before it could bear any potential.

So it was with a bit of irony that Berbatov, usually of the masterful near miss, opened the scoring in the 33^rd. Following a Newcastle turnover as they tried to bring it out of their end, Scholes collected to lead Berbatov just off the right post, the keeper helpless as the Bulgarian passed it into the opposite corner with his left foot.

Joey Barton beat Nani down the right side in the 38^th, but his shot, like any others Newcastle would manage for the remainder, went directly to Van der Sar. Better chances would come, but the accuracy was never adjusted.

In the 42^nd, Nani, the most dynamic player on the field by far, with rushes down the wing and up the middle, threaded a ball into the area for a surging Patrice Evra, who lashed a pass across that found Darren Fletcher after Rooney was unable to contain. With Coloccini right on him, Fletcher turned and slotted home.

The second half opened with more brilliance from Nani; further showing why this will be his year, he burst through mid and into the box with amazing pace, only to be denied by a tandem of defenders.

Scholes, having just taken care of his yellow card obligations, thought he drew a penalty kick in the 53^rd, but he went down far too easily, following contact from Coloccini, for someone prone to dispensing harsh tackles. But the creativity sorely lacking from England’s midfield was on ample display. Another of his sublime flicks sent Berbatov ahead towards goal, the ball just going wide after being slotted under the keeper.

While he could be forgiven since he opened up the scoring, the missed opportunities again began to mount for Berbatov, with a ball sent across the goal mouth in the 68^th, a Giggs (on for Nani in the 72^nd) led feed towards goal in the 77^th, and an Evra led through pass that he couldn’t lift over the keeper all standing out, all glaring since the faithful knew the Wayne Rooney of old would have buried at least one, if not two of these chances.

But, as it was, Rooney’s crestfallen ineffectiveness- ironically, he slotted home in an off-sides situation prior to his exit- and Berba’s 2^nd half fruitless industry caused everyone to pin their hopes on Chicharito following his insertion in the 63^rd. On for Rooney, a blazing Chicharito was found by Nani for a rush that would have meant goal, but for being a hair afoul of the linesman.

The instincts and pace are definitely there for the Mexican international, however. It’s worth noting his run to the back post just as Giggs’ slotted home to the same corner upon being picked out by a perfectly placed right side cross by Scholes. Firing from the left top corner of the area, Giggs’ shot bounced off the pitch twice before finding the far side, while Chicharito was right there should the shot go awry.

Minnows Chelsea will hope to avoid relegation as they battle it out at the bottom with Wolves and Blackpool. What? I never said this was an accurate preview!

Chelsea made very few changes from last season’s trophy-winning squad. In come Yossi Benayoun from Liverpool and Ramires from Benfica. Out go Michael Ballack, Deco, Joe Cole and a host of other guys who were never going to set foot on the Stamford Bridge pitch during league play. Chelsea can afford to sit back and spend little because their competitors at the top are all in dire financial straits. Manchester United is owned by the Tenenbaums, Arsenal has an actual business plan, Liverpool is a mess, and Manchester City seems like they’re just buying enough players so they can trade in the UPCs for a secret decoder ring.

Drogba (L) and Essien discuss Inception, disagree on what the ending meant.

Chelsea also has a trump card: Michael Essien. When the Ghanian middie is healthy, there is nobody better at owning a midfield. Essien’s play allows the rest of the midfield (seriously, all of them) to push forward and pretend that they don’t have any defensive responsibilities. From this perspective, you could blame Essien for England’s World Cup performance. Nobody told Lampard about the other half of the pitch! What do you mean, “cover him”? Like with a towel, mate?

Gael Kakuta

Key to Chelsea’s title hopes will be Nicolas Anelka. If he doesn’t recover from his World Cup scandal, the French striker will be a major issue in the locker room. And Chelsea, for all its money, doesn’t have a suitable cover option for Le Sulk. Kalou is more famous for his misses than his makes and Daniel Sturridge has yet to prove he’s the real deal. Manager Carlo Ancelotti – aka the Aged, Disillusioned Pillsbury Doughboy – may turn to Gael Kakuta this year. Kakuta is famous for earning Chelsea a transfer ban over their nefarious dealings to acquire the French youngster. He has been impressive in the preseason and in the U19 World Cup.

Chelsea recently sold Ricardo Carvalho to Real Madrid. The center back has been injured for much of his Blues tenure, but he showed that he is still a top talent during the World Cup. Portugal allowed only one goal and ZonalMarking.com named Carvalho to its top eleven. His sale means that Ancelotti expects Alex to play a more prominent role this year. Although Ivanovic may push inside if Jose Bosingwa can regain his position on the right.

Chelsea will play Ancelotti’s patented 4-4-2, with 3 to 4 center midfielders, depending on Florent Malouda’s health. This formation allows Frank Lampard to push very high and get first crack at all the balls Drogba and Anelka deftly knock into his path. Chelsea can play such a compact style because they are so good at counterattacking. If you build a defense to fit their narrow system, you open up space that Drogba, Anelka and Malouda exploit to great effect. The truth is, Chelsea’s offensive unit is physically talented, but also very smart. I know, it sucks.

Buy this jersey: Andriy Shevchenko. Because you are a funny guy, funny guy.

West Brom is the middle child of the promoted teams. They don’t have a stay-up imperative like Newcastle, but they haven’t acted like their time in the premiership will be a hello-how’s-your-father like Blackpool. Manager Roberto Di Matteo is looking to add attacking options before the transfer window closes, with Liverpool beanpole David Ngog at the top of his list. Di Matteo can stand in line behind the entire Kop fanbase in hoping that the Reds sign another quality striker before the end of August.

West Brom will benefit from having experience in the back. Nicky Shorey, Steven Reid and Scott Carson have boatloads of EPL experience, and Pablo Ibanez will look to step into the center of the defense from the get-go, no easy assignment when Didier Drogba will be your first opponent. Carson is hoping that WBA’s return to the EPL will be the first step towards climbing back into the England goalkeeping picture. And who’s to argue with him? Not Robert Green, that’s for sure.

West Brom will come out in a 4-5-1 on Saturday or I will eat my hat (luckily, I make my hats out of egg whites and challah bread). Midfielders Graham Dorrans and Chris Brunt will have the extremely difficult task of clogging up the Chelsea midfield while starting the counterattack that will likely be WBA’s only chance to put up a crooked number. As the season progresses, Dorrans will have opportunities to press forward in a Gerrard-like role. But not Saturday.

Buy this jersey: Dorrans. He’s young, tough and talented. If West Brom goes down, he’ll be the player that will fund their rebuilding process in the Championship next season. Dorrans had 13 goals last year and will score in the EPL as well. His adjustment to the big stage will determine the potency of WBA’s offense.

Go over the "scoring" thing again...

Aston Villa is a team in turmoil. They constantly seemed to be on the brink of breaking into the EPL’s elite during Martin O’Neill’s tenure, but the leap never materialized. O’Neill’s favored 4-3-3 was a vicious animal to contain when his top eleven were healthy, but Emile Heskey is no John Carew, and, strange as it sounds, there is only one Gaby Agbonlahor. Agbonlahor started 35 games last year but netted only 13 times. He will have to improve on that total if Villa are to compete for a Europa League spot this year. There is no depth at the striker position beyond Emile Heskey, and I think that information speaks for itself.

Villa’s strength is wing play. Ashley Young and Stewart Downing are both rising stars who will be expected to improve on last season’s displays. James Milner can play wide or in the center, but it’s more likely that he’ll be playing in Manchester than anywhere in the Villa lineup. This is a huge loss for a team that relied heavily on Milner’s stellar play last season. Starlet Fabian Delph will be asked to step up early in the year. He started their first match last season before injuries, Milner’s emergence, and Downing’s return relegated him to the deep part of the bench.If Delph struggles, the burden of ball movement falls on the slight shoulders of Nigel Re0-Coker and Steve Sidwell, a pair of guys who define the phrase, “belongs in the Championship division”.

In the back, Aston Villa is a mixed bag. Carlos Cuellar will miss the first game of the year with injury. Richard Dunne is a poor man’s Jamie Carragher, a pub favorite who will still make three timely tackles for every bad PK he gives up. Expect Villa’s defense to make mistakes, but expect Brad Friedel to save them from embarrassment. He’s immortal, after all.

Buy this jersey: Friedel. Because when the apocalypse comes and you kneel before Brad Friedel’s feet at the gates of Friedeland, you’ll probably want to have his jersey on.

West Ham, guided by former Chelsea and Portsmouth man Avram Grant, will be an interesting team to watch this season, but that doesn’t make them an interesting team to write about. I recently heard them described as, “Scott Parker and those guys”. Totally accurate. Carlton Cole is still a big galoof who will have dominant games and games where he passes through-balls to the other team’s strikers (what? Defoe was open!) Robert Green will play very well in goal but still look like an overgrown leprechaun. Matthew Upson will remain a talented center back who somehow never takes the next step to stardom. Mark Noble will continue to become the next Scott Parker. Kieron Dyer will fund the retirement of another physical therapist.

West Ham has traditionally had great youth development. Junior Stanislas, Zavon Hines and Freddie Sears are the latest players looking to push into the top squad. Stanislas and Sears in particular will look to make an impression, as Avram Grant will be very willing to put young players in tough positions.

Buy this jersey: Scott Parker, and not just because it’s the only one you’ll find. Parker is what Tottenham’s Jermaine Jenas and Aston Villa’s Steve Sidwell should be: A player who understands that his team will rise and fall with his energy level. He makes mistakes, he’s less talented than many of his opponents, but he works and works. Plus, he could’ve been a hair double for Michael J. Fox in Back To The Future.

Tottenham v. Manchester City – 7:45am ESPN2

Tottenham was remarkably consistent last term and won at least one match every month. They are a team that can score goals at will when they are clicking, which generally means when Jermain Defoe is playing well. Defoe will partner up top with the usual suspects: Peter Crouch, Eidur Gudjohnsen and Roman Pavlyuchenko. There has been talk of Crouch leaving before the end of August, but that will probably take a bid in excess of 10 million pounds because Hotspur manager ‘Arry Redknapp won’t trust Pavlyuchenko as a top striker, no matter how many good shifts the Russian puts in.

Tottenham has always lacked a true playmaker. Their defense isn’t good enough to withstand heavy pressure and they rely on streaky central midfielders who are too prone to giving away possession. If Tottenham makes a run at the title this season, either Tom Huddlestone or Jermaine Jenas will be the driving force.

Two seasons ago, Hotspurs thought they had their playmaker in Luka Modric. The Croatian has all the tools to become the ball-moving middie Tottenham needs if they want to build on last year’s success. Modric spent most of last season playing in a wide left position. His ability to draw multiple defenders allowed Tottenham to quickly switch fields and give Aaron Lennon space to operate on the right. After Wilson Palacios’ suspension late in 09-10, Modric moved back to the middle and was instrumental in pushing Tottenham to big wins over Chelsea, Arsenal and Manchester City. If he continues to flourish in the center, it allows Redknapp to deploy the silky smooth Niko Kranjcar on the left and gives Spurs a Croatian-crapton of weapons going forward.

Buy this jersey: I want to say Pavlyuchenko so bad, but I know Eli will call me up and phone-punch me if I do. So buy Palacios. His hard work in the midfield will be crucial if Tottenham’s high-powered offense is going to push forward and sustain pressure on opposing defenses.

Manchester City is your favorite team if you love playing FIFA10 but don’t watch or play much soccer. The modus operandi of the owners is to buy all the talent you can find and splatter it across the field as if it was a Jackson Pollock canvas. New summer signings David Silva, Yaya Toure, Jerome Boateng and Alex Kolarov (and possibly James Milner and Mario Balotelli) join Roberto Mancini‘s Wet Dream squad for the upcoming year and the expectation in a league crown.

It’s impossible to predict but undeniably exciting to find out what lineup Mancini will use each week. It’s like he’s roasting marshmallows over a giant fire: He could get s’mores, but then again it could very easily go up in flames. Manchester City’s squad list suggests they’ll play a 4-4-2, instead of the mutated 4-3-3 Mancini favored last year with Bellamy kicking chalk on the wing.

Emmanuel Adebayour and Carlos Tevez are probably locks to start this weekend. On the wings, Mancini has a gross amount of talent, but it’s likely that Silva and young star Adam Johnson will get the call. Johnson was particularly impressive after arriving in January, and Fabio Capello will should be watching the young Englishman with interest. Gareth Barry will hope to hold onto his role in central midfield and improve on a fairly lackluster first season in powder blue. He’ll partner with either Nigel De Jong (black belt) or Vincent Kompany, who can probably be purchased at IKEA. If any of the central middies struggle, Yaya will be ready to step in and play strong defense while playing errant passes to increasingly frustrated strikers.

There is plenty of competition in the back. Serbian new boy Kolarov will probably start above Wayne Bridge since Wayne Bridge is not very good. Micah Richards will try to hold onto his right back position by playing extremely well and maddeningly poor in back to back games. If Richards struggles, expect Lescott to move to the right so Boateng can slot in next to Kolo Toure in the back. At this point, expect me to start begging Roy Hodgson to sign Richards so, god-willing, Fabio Aurelio is no longer in the Reds starting lineup (come on, god. Have a heart.)

Any time teams that are expected to finish close to each other in the table play, it’s a big game. This one will have increased meaning for City, who truly felt they deserved to make Champions League last season on to finish below a streaking Spurs squad. Every point Manchester City drops will be viewed as an epic failure by their fans, owners, and FIFA players everywhere.

Buy this jersey: Balotelli. Just do it. He’s super duper talented. Player of the year talented, even. But he’s also kinda insane. He stomps around the pitch like an eight year old that just had his allowance taken away, then he scores incredible goals, then doesn’t smile, then takes dives like he grew up watching Drogba highlights (lowlights).

I was going to write a column about this until I realized I already wrote one — eight months ago. Amazingly, it all remains relevant today, so I’m reposting it below. All that’s changed is that Donovan proved what was predicted.

• He proved he can play in one of the world’s best leagues and star for one of its better teams.
• He’s now a household name in the U.S., and our one soccer superstar needs to be given the chance to pave the way for others like him.
• The transfer fee will never be higher than now for a 28-year-old World Cup star. His $10 million-plus transfer fee could equal the total cost of a designated player for each MLS team.

Don Garber’s pronouncement that Donovan isn’t for sale is hopefully just a negotiating tactic to hike his transfer fee. Yes, casual fans might go to a Philadelphia Union game if Donovan plays, but one Donovan visit a year to Dallas won’t change that franchise’s problems. Regular fans are more likely to have a residual distaste for MLS’s refusal to let a great player grow and its missed opportunity to reinvest on a broader basis.

MLS must show it won’t trap promising players. (See Twellman, Taylor.) Otherwise, the Stuart Holdens and Danny Mwangas of MLS will plan to leave as soon as their rookie contracts expire, because they’ll be trapped later. That in turn could force MLS to sell them well before they peak — which means lower transfer fees — or get nothing when they leave on free transfers, as happened with Holden (and possibly now Jonathan Bornstein).

Donovan needs to go abroad. Here’s why, as first published here on Dec. 6, 2009:

Donovan to Europe — the best thing for MLS

Straight Outta Craven

The Champions League is a big deal. And with such a hyperbolic name, it better be. But the Champions League is also one of the biggest culprits behind financial mess engulfing the footy world these days. A place is the Champions League is worth so much money that clubs deficit-spend like crazy in order to give themselves a chance to secure a spot in Europe’s biggest money pit. In 2005, it was estimated that winning Champions League brought Liverpool an extra $47 million in revenue over the next year.

But for all its big names, the Champions League can be a bit boring. There’s a reason why the All-Star game is only played once a year. Since 1990, when the formation of the English Premier League announced soccer’s intent to become bigger than big business, only four clubs not considered global powerhouses have won Europe’s biggest prize. And let us not forget the 2008 final between Manchester United and Chelsea – easily one of the most boring games of soccer you will ever see. Ever. It’s more boring than this article, so don’t go look it up, just keep reading.

Fulham manager Roy Hodgson, aka Neo

And if you thought the Europa League was the Champions League’s baby brother, you’re only partially right. The winner of tonight’s Europa League final between Fulham and Atletico Madrid will take home close to $8 million in UEFA bonuses. That, coupled with increased revenue from sponsorships and consumer sales, is an almost unfathomable financial boost for a club like Fulham. However, it is a gift and a curse. If you invest that money in your squad but don’t make in to Europe next year, you’re in a huge hole and you have to start selling. A European championship can change the dreams of a club like Fulham from “stay in the top flight” to “make Champions League”. How high should a small club aim?

The most notable thing about Fulham’s run to the Europa League final is how often they’ve been the better team. While neither Atletico or Fulham lost a home game, Atletico tied all but one while Fulham reeled off victories over Shahktar Donetsk, Wolfsburg, and Juventus. The Juve game was the best match of the entire tournament, as Craven Cottage was treated to an epic comeback after a 1-3 defeat at Turin. Atletico’s biggest win was actually a loss. An extra time goal by Diego Forlan gave them an away goals victory over Liverpool and put them into the final.

Forlan and Kun Aguero will lead a strong Atletico attack into Hamburg, the site of this year’s final. Brede Hangeland will be tasked with stopping Forlan’s powerful left foot for Fulham while they’ll rely on Bobby Zamora and American Clint Dempsey for offense. Zamora has been fantastic in the tournament but he is coming off an injury that could see him less than one hundred percent.

What makes this a great final is how well the two teams embody their home country’s styles of play. Fulham will battle in the midfield and try to slow down the swift Atletico counterattack with crunching tackles and a strong aerial presence. Fulham’s midfield revolves around Danny Murphy, who has to have a great match for the Cottagers to win. Atletico’s defense is shaky at best, so they look to get the ball forward as fast as possible. When Jose Antonio Reyes and Simao are on their games, Atletico can move the ball upfield on the wings with the best. When those players are low in confidence, the red and whites crumble like… well, like Reyes himself whenever he gets close to the box.

Here’s how each team got to the final:

Group Stage

*Athletico Madrid only entered the Europa Cup in the knockout stage. Third place finishers in Champions League move to Europa knockout phase. I know, it’s stupid.

CSKA Sofia 1-1 Fulham

Fulham 1-0 Basel

Fulham 1-1 Roma

Roma 2-1 Fulham

Fulham 1-0 CSKA Sofia

Basel 2-3 Fulham

Round of 32

Fulham 2-1 Shakhtar Donetsk

Shakhtar Donetsk 1-1 Fulham

Athletico Madrid 1-1 Galatasaray

Galatasaray 1-2 Athletico Madrid

Round of 16

Atletico 0-0 Sporting Lisbon

Sporting Lisbon 2-2 Athletico Madrid (2-2 on aggregate, Athletico on away goals)

Juventus 3-1 Fulham

Fulham 4-1 Juventus

Quarterfinals

Valencia 2-2 Athletico Madrid

Athletico Madrid 0-0 Valencia (2-2 aggregate, Athletico on away goals)

Fulham 2-1 Wolfsburg

Wolfsburg 0-1 Fulham

Semifinals

Athletico 1-0 Liverpool

Liverpool 2-1 Athletico (2-2 aggregate, Athletico on away goals)

Hamburg 0-0 Fulham

Fulham 2-1 Hamburg

Liverpool currently sits level with their Manchester counterparts in the all-time glory category. That is, if the Red Devils can stave off a Tottenham club that kept the race close this past  weekend with a 2-1 defeat of Chelsea that keeps them well on their way to top flight European football, a level of play set to remain a mere memory for Steven Gerrard et al (expect more su-su sussudio inspired punch-ups soo-soo soon).

One can imagine the chants, with the best surely saved for Man U’s trip to Anfield next season. United, lucky to have pulled out a win against Man City with an amazing final seconds header by Paul Scholes while Rooney still looks to return to his former lethal heights following his ankle injury scare, have the better luck as their critical final three game against Tottenham will be at Old Trafford. Chelsea must venture to Merseyside for the toughest match of their remaining three fixtures. Certainly Stoke City – to play both Chelsea and Man U – can be a spoiler as well as Sunderland, which hosts Man U in their second to last match. If not Tottenham or Liverpool, the money would have to go next on Wigan Athletic meddling with the title race on the last day of action.

Unlikely, yes, but not impossible, given that Wigan ended a 34-year streak of losing to top four teams by embarrassing Chelsea 3-1 in a match that saw Petr Czech sent off prior to a PK conversion that gave  the hosts the lead, which they added to in extra time.

So why not count on lightning striking twice, especially since a Chelsea victory is as assured as a John Terry penalty kick? Sure, there’s the Rafa Benitez v Carlo Ancelotti tension dating back to their respective Champions League heydays (when the latter was with AC Milan), so one can envision Rafa relishing in exacting a damaging piece of revenge.

But perhaps mercurial Wigan can shock the world by calming the ship and ending on a high note. Their season has been marked equally by drubbings at the hands of Manchester United (5-0 both times) and Tottenham (9-1!), and shocker results such as the one against Chelsea and acts of revenge against Liverpool and Arsenal (having lost 2-1 and 4-0 in the respective earlier fixtures, they followed up with 1-0 and 3-2 wins).  The sky’s the limit for Wigan and for how Chelsea can once again come up miserably short.

(Unlike miserable Chelsea, Brion Shreffler actually has respect for Liverpool and their players. Guess which team he supports.)

But the game wasn’t all one way traffic for Villa.  Portsmouth took an early lead through a brilliant 10^th minute strike from midfielder Michael Brown, his first goal in close to 6 years and Villa equalized a short time later through John Carew’s 17^th minute goal.  But much of the first half and the early parts of the 2^nd half was a midfield battle that saw both teams struggle to keep possession and create chances.  Villa eventually took the reigns in the 2^nd half before Nathan Delfouneso knocked in a loose ball with 10 minutes remaining.  But Pompey was spirited throughout and had enough of their own chances that a draw wasn’t unconceivable.

This is the effort that I’ve seen from Portsmouth every time when I have watched them this season. They are in the FA Cup Final against Chelsea next month and it would be difficult to argue that they don’t belong there.  And it’s crazy to think that they might secure a European spot regardless of the result of the final.  Save for a couple of drubbings from the likes of Chelsea, Manchester United and Liverpool, Pompey has been competitive in almost every game in the league.  Looking down the page at their results, you see lots of 2-1 games.

So I have to give full credit to Avram Grant and the whole Portsmouth side.  It would have been easy to pack it in after going into administration and just play out the string and call it a season.  But they’ve done anything but that, coming out for every game and at least competing week to week.  And if they can get their financial situation under control and find a reliable owner, you have to tap them to at least compete for promotion straight back to the Prem.