Germany to Octopus: Say it isn’t so!

The nation of Germany is in shock as Paul, the “oracle octopus,” has picked Spain to win over Germany in today’s World Cup semifinal. Thus far Paul has accurately predicted the results of all five of Germany’s World Cup matches, including the loss to Serbia. Beginning with Euro 2008, the cephalopod has a record of 9-1, his only previous prediction gone bad being that Germany would beat Spain in the Euro 2008 final. Oliver Walenciak, Paul’s keeper, says that the octopus is unfazed by recent death threats. “There are always people who want to eat our octopus but he is not shy and we are here to protect him as well. He will survive.”

Meanwhile, controversy is brewing in the German camp over World Cup captain Philip Lahm’s comments that he has no intention of relinquishing the armband to Michael Ballack when Ballack recovers from his ankle injury.

Toolzinho: At the premier of his new movie - called "Explosive Encounter" in the Brazilian market (which sounds like something that happens to me after too many beers and bean burritos) - in Rio, Tom Cruise shows off the brand new shirt that he will never wear.

Jozy Altidore went to a  Mets game on Monday and talked to reporters about the fact that no US striker has scored a goal in the last two World Cups, his disappointment at losing to Ghana, Bob Bradley’s future, and his own at Villareal. “There are a lot of things I can improve on. I’m not even close to a finished product.”

SI’s Steve Davis looks at Bob Bradley’s future as coach of the national team which, given that his contract expires in December, is not likely to be much longer. Lurking in the background is the guy US soccer wanted in the first place: Jürgen Klinsmann, who gets an in depth look in this San Diego Union-Tribune piece that argues the current success of the German team can be traced directly to Klinsmann’s stint as head coach. For a recap of what Klinsmann has had to say recently about US soccer, look at this earlier piece by Davis.

Self-admitted soccer critic Jay Mariotti of Fanhouse.com has a very thoughtful piece on Landon Donovan and the burden of his task: sell soccer in the US long-term.

The data is in from NASA: much like funding for manned space missions, the Jabulani ball is “erratic and unpredictable.” Thank goodness for NASA scientists.

Maradona's already got a statue - that's it in the doorway to the left in this shop outside of Estadio Alberto J. Armando, Boca Juniors stadium in Buenos Aires. Photo courtesy of Richard Caswell.

An Argentinian lawmaker has proposed erecting a statue of Maradona in honor of his status “as an icon of popular Argentine culture.” Whether Maradona will stay on as coach of Argentina is reportedly up to him but everyone from the president of the country to an assistant coach and players on the national team are encouraging him to do so.

Everybody has their favorite soccer bar. Here’s a look at one in Chicago and what it means to its owner and the soccer community in that city.

Yahoo! Sports is reporting that “according to multiple sources,” AC Milan is interested in Clint Dempsey. Speaking of Americans at AC Milan, Oguchi Onyewu is busy refusing loan offers as he hopes to establish himself on the Serie A team.

Two Italian soccer fans were shot in a bar in Hannover, Germany and later died after getting into an argument with a German soccer fan about their countries respective histories at the World Cup.

Barcelona is forced to seek a €150m loan in order to pay wages owed to coaching staff and players.

Chelsea are preparing “what is likely to be a record British transfer fee” bid for Fernando Torres.

Why I wish I was still in college: Rutgers-Newark is offering a summer course on the global history of soccer.